Today starts the first week of robbis shared custody. It is her scheduled day. I had an mri at 330, and figured since I was getting out early I would go get the kids for her. She seemed very appreciative. Then tells me she is taking scott to drop his bike off at the shop. Then tells me she is getting a drink with him. 1 drink at a bar. At 7:30 pm I asked if she was home soon, and she had just ordered food.
There is more going on with her relationship with him than she is telling me. 9:58 right now and still not home. First day is hers, and she takes advantage.
She came home at 1am, on a monday night. When I asked if she spent the whole night at the bar or went to his house, she refused to answer me because she didn’t want to say anything that could be used against her. Well with her refusal to answer, that tells me she did.
Sunday, 4/11 I worked in the morning, then immediately after went bowling. I got a text from Robbi at 615 asking if I was done yet, then another at 645 saying “thanks for letting me know”. When I was finished at 7, I then looked at my phone, its usually on vibrate when I bowl to not disturb others. I responded “Sorry, didnt get your txt till now, I’m on my way home. I get home and she is not home.
I txt and ask where she is and she said at kroger shopping and wanted me to answer her so she didnt have to take the kids. So I shower and lay down. 8:30, she storms through the door “MATT!! Give these kids a bath!!” wow, ok. then I ask is everything OK? “FINE” she says, then I say “what the heck did I do?” Skylar then adds, “She has been like this all day.” Its bad when Robbi’s anger is starting to be noticed by children. Frankly there is no reason for her to be angry.
I have suggested to robbi to switch her meds, she is really unstable right now. There isn’t a good conversation with her that doesn’t turn bad for no reason.
This morning I ask if she did laundry, and says “Yes but not yours” I ask why, she responds with I havent done yours in a couple weeks, you are capable of doing your own. This is getting ridiculous.
Robbi and I had a great productive talk, we both felt good about us and the situation. Then friday, the 9th, I txt to tell her how much I enjoyed the evening. After long nice txts back and forth, she kept asking why I would even want to be with her after all this. I said I loved her a lot and believe we would be able to work through it all. The I said but if she didn’t want to take care of me and my ms then that’s just coldhearted and maybe I don’t. She took it as me calling her a name and ignored me the rest of the day, then went out bowling with her ex boyfriend and all her old friends from high school. She didn’t come home until 2, which bowling centers obviously don’t stay open that long, but she went over one of the kids houses to continue the party and to smoke weed. She has a drinking problem when she goes out, she never knows when to stop. Also to drive home after all that doesn’t make me very happy.
Robbi told me today she signed her paperwork for the divorce. Yes, OK, I’ll deal with it, it was coming.
This verbatim txt conversation was strange…
R-Do you mind if I go to the mall tonight?
M-I was just going to ask if I can stay late. What do you need at the mall?
R-I ruined my good jeans and Char needs new earings she can’t pull out.
M-Well, is it something you can take the kids with you?
M-I’m sorry, I’m really busy and I don’t have Ryan’s help he is going to the accountant.
R-You know when we are divorced, and it is your day with the kids, it doesn’t matter if you are busy or not.
M-We aren’t divorced yet. You told me the other day if I need to work late, you are OK with it.
R-I’m not OK with you never seeing your kids. I don’t know why you want them half the time…you always have more important things to do.
M-Wait, working is not more important than going to the mall? I’m sorry, I have big jobs that need to get done, this isn’t about kids.
R-Sure hope those big jobs turn into a car payment one day.
M-I have been busting my ass, working 7 days a week without a day off in over a month, and I did that for YOU and US and our FAMILY. I now have to do this so I can live in the future and not live in a box. I’m sorry your jeans can wait a day.
R-No matter I have different plans now, see ya.
Everything I do she takes as a reflection of my parenting. She is trying to take the kids. We’ll see how this develops.
Well, today is the day. Robbi finally did the enevitable and is having the lawyer draw up the papers for the divorce. I knew it was coming, so why is it so damn difficult to deal with? My life changes from here on. The kids lives as well. Charlotte will never remember living with her father. I dred even telling skylar the news.
So what do I do from here? I don’t know. I’ll move out when it is ok for me to do so, which in my mind never is ok. Time to figure out how to live your life single again. Robbi says she doesn’t want to hurt me, but then why is she giving the most hurt u could possible give someone? This sucks.
I have a timetable with my MS, I thought robbi would be there for me when I needed her. Nope, she wants no part and has told me so. What kind of person was I in love with.